For This House
Every Season. Every Space. All for Him.
Every Season. Every Space. All for Him.
October 6, 2025 | 8 min read
Kayla Anthony
I recently started a 52-week Bible study, and to be honest, I was a little intimidated by the idea of reading the entirety of the Bible in just one year.
Will I even understand what I’m reading? How exactly will this apply to my struggles of modern day motherhood, being a wife, or just a humble servant to the Lord?
At 34 years old I lacked real clarity on just about every single aspect of my life. The arrogance of my youth has slowly faded away and a whirlwind of confusion is slowly replacing it. I was less than a year into my walk with Jesus and still building my faith each and every day.
According to my Therapist (and she’s almost always right), my inability to stop worrying about the future contributes largely to my anxiety. Not really a surprise, but a tough truth to grapple with all the same. My relationship with Jesus is teaching me how to let go of the grip I have on my life and really embrace each moment as it comes. However, I’ve continued to struggle to loosen my grip on just one thing.
When I was 24 I found out I was pregnant. This came as a big surprise, but I was still so excited. My nerves were also high. Would I be worthy of this little human I was about to bring into this world?
When Rylan was born he came into the world facing a few challenges. He had severe jaundice and had difficulty eating. I was scared for him, but he was stronger than I ever thought he could be. Little did I know that this was going to be the first of many scary realities we would soon be facing.
When he was around a year and a half old my mom cautiously decided to have a conversation with me about some of the unusual behaviors she had observed over the course of her time watching him. She has been a day care provider for as long as I can remember and she knows what she’s talking about. He was always walking on his tip-toes, spinning, and paid little attention to the other children around him.
I laughed some of this off. I guess being a first-time Mom I had just assumed that some of those behaviors were normal. Nevertheless, I cautiously agreed to take him to a specialist. It took her all of ten minutes to diagnose him with Autism Spectrum Disorder. I found myself leaving her office drowning in a pile of brochures and paperwork. All-the-while, all I could think was, “How do I protect him?”
Now, 10 years later, he is happy and thriving. He loves his family, enjoys going to school, and is one the sweetest souls. I will be forever grateful to my mother for having the courage to say something because I know how difficult that can be.
Rylan’s dad and I hit the ground running the day after his diagnosis. We learned as much as we could as quickly as we could. We were never really sure if he would eventually be able to speak. At 10 he still does not have words. He is completely non-verbal. In spite of that, his dad and I have worked so hard to get to understand the various ways in which he communicates. For the most part, we have him figured out right down to what snack he’s in the mood for. We have become fierce advocates and we always try to make the choices that would be best for him.
I don’t always enjoy having to speak on his behalf because I wish he could. I would love nothing more for him to have a say in what his life looks like going forward. So I’ve often asked myself this question: “Am I doing the right thing?”
Sometimes God has a funny way of giving us an answer when we least expect it. Let me say, I was not expecting this one. I had finally reached Exodus and I was so excited to read about Moses. Moses is such a pivotal figure, and although I was somewhat familiar with how the story goes, I was eager to learn more about him. Needless to say, I think I was being pulled towards his story for a much more important reason. When I got to Exodus 4, it’s verse 10 that got my attention:
Moses said to the Lord, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” (Exodus 4:10)
I had no idea Moses struggled with speech. This was never something I had heard anyone discuss before. This was a huge discovery. What would God’s response be?
The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.” (Exodus 4: 11-12)
God’s response in that moment was so refreshing. He tells Moses, in no uncertain terms, that He has made Moses just as He had intended him to be. This was such a wonderful reminder that God does not make mistakes. He makes us all as His very own works of art. We are made in His image. I continued reading…
But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.” (Exodus 4:13).
It was heartbreaking to read that Moses had responded in that way. He had so little confidence in himself that even God’s confidence could not convince him. This was a stark reminder that God believes in us, but our confidence must come from our faith in Him.
“Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses and he said, “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and he will be glad to see you. You shall speak to him and put words in his mouth; I will help both of you speak and will teach you what to do. He will speak to the people for you, and it will be as if he were your mouth and as if you were God to him. But take this staff in your hand so you can perform signs with it.” (Exodus 4:14-17)
Of course God’s initial reaction is understandable. Moses has rejected his requests twice. However, that wasn’t the most important part of God’s response to Moses; it was how He pivoted and suggested that his brother, Aaron, speak for him. This was remarkable to read.
There are several important messages that I believe God wants us to hear when He makes this suggestion to Moses.
God meets us right where we are. He loves us just as we are.
This was exactly what I needed to hear. For once I didn’t have to question whether or not it was appropriate to be my son’s voice. It doesn’t take away from God’s plans for him. In some ways, it may just make those plans that much better.
God showed up for me at that moment. Moses and Aaron are two figures that will stick with me for the remainder of my life. I am humbled God chose me to be Rylan’s mom. Rylan has so much to share with this world and I couldn’t be happier to be the person to help him do just that.
Heavenly Father,
Help me to pick up my Bible and look to Your word for guidance, that I may find peace and comfort in Your Word.
May the Scripture be a reminder that You have a plan and a purpose for my life. Allow my Bible study time to draw me closer to You.
I pray that I may feel Your presence in this time so the stresses of life start to fade. More than anything, show me Your everlasting love through Your story.
Amen
Kayla is a caregiver, writer, and disability advocate from Rifle, CO. She’s a mom, wife, and nature-lover. She enjoys spending time with family, exercising, and drinking coffee while listening to a bit of jazz music. Follow her on Instagram at @way_of_kay_writes.
Kayla is a caregiver, writer, and disability advocate from Rifle, CO. She’s a mom, wife, and nature-lover. She enjoys spending time with family, exercising, and drinking coffee while listening to a bit of jazz music. Follow her on Instagram at @way_of_kay_writes.