For This House
Every Season. Every Space. All for Him.
Every Season. Every Space. All for Him.
This is a topic I’ve meant to write on for a long time. I have battled with imposter syndrome for a long time in my professional career, and now I feel it seeping into other areas of my life.
For those who haven’t heard this term, “imposter syndrome” is simply described as self-doubt of intellect, skills, or accomplishments. A fancy word for, likely, an all-too-common ailment. (Even Camila Cabello admits to it!)
So here’s my journey and what I’m doing about it.
Professionally, I have worked in full-time marketing for the last five years and specialized in search engine optimization (SEO) for most of that time.
I learned everything I know about SEO on the job along with a lot of personal research in order to stay on trend and do what was best for our clients in various industries.
It was exhilarating learning new things and becoming the resident expert on my team in this area, but a few years in, I started experiencing doubts about my skills and solutions.
You see, marketing is a tricky business for someone struggling with self-doubt because it’s constantly changing and evolving. There are endless trends to keep up with on so many different platforms and devices. You could drive yourself mad trying to stay on top of it all.
And I did. I let it get to me and my confidence as an SEO professional. I doubted my research and deductions to the point I was ready to quit.
Then I found out I was pregnant… the perfect escape route so that no one would know what I was truly battling with. I could exit the stage right now and not have to acknowledge my hesitation in continuing to pursue this career path.
The only problem is that these feelings of self-doubt subsided for a time after giving up the main source of the matter before they resurfaced in other ways.
I’m not troubleshooting web presence issues and seeking out industry-leading solutions full-time anymore, I’m raising two humans to be contributing citizens and loving members of society. I’m not sure how I thought marketing was the harder role.
Queue the imposter syndrome.
Except this time, it’s infiltrating my mind in a role that I cannot change. I cannot walk away from this position I hold as the mother of these two boys. I cannot sidestep the issue here; I have to forge through it.
Now that I have finally recognized this, I can call it out for what it is.
The devil is sneaky. He’s conniving and manipulative. He can take a beautiful thing and taint it with one itty bitty detail.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
In both scenarios, I have led with the best of me, giving each role everything I had, knowing this is what I’ve been called to do.
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.”
“So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God.”
And yet Satan found a way to turn my potential against me with feelings of self-doubt and anxiety.
Even in my motherhood. That’s low, Satan. But I know that’s your game.
So here’s what I’m going to do about it…
I can hope all I want that the still small voice in my head is the Word of the Lord permeating my thoughts, but that’s not always the case. Because the devil is so sneaky, he knows exactly what and how to mimic. We need to be smarter. See his tricks for what they are.
Being in the Word of God is the only way we can equip ourselves against the shady messages the devil is trying to plant. It’s a journey we’re all on as Christians—new or not—but it’s a journey you need to be on. Get in there. Read it. Listen to it. Discuss it. Whatever it takes to rewrite the wrong things that you’re hearing.
It’s so tempting to seek external validation for our work. Whether it is a gushing client review or a simple, “Thank you, I love you, Mom,” none of it really matters if you’re already living out Colossians 3:23. Do everything to the best of your ability, for the glory of God, and forget about seeking what anyone else (including yourself) thinks.
It’s taken me months to pen this blog because of the self-doubt this so-called “Imposter Syndrome” has instilled in me. And now, putting it all out there feels like letting go, finally. I’ve been mulling over how to put this into words for so long, and now it’s out.
That said, this will always be a work in progress, so I invite you to pray with me to shut out the voice of self-doubt.
Lord,
Help me silence the voice of self-doubt and grant me the wisdom to discern Your truth from the lies I hear.
Fill my mind with Your Word, that I may rewrite the narrative of inadequacy with Your promises of love and purpose.
Give us the strength to pursue excellence in all we do, not for the praise of others but for Your glory alone.
Amen.
Lauren is a founder of For This House. She is learning and growing every day to live authentically for Christ in all things. Lauren lives in British Columbia with her family of boys. She enjoys nature walks, quality time with family or friends, and exploring new places. Learn more about Lauren.